Self-Care Kit

Dear Fellow Journalers,

A Self-Care Kit is  great thing for yourself and for others who are struggling. Sometimes when we do for others we end up healing ourselves too. You can use a basket or a decorative box. The items are anything that brings comfort and care.

So, some of those things are:

  • Weighted blanket or throw
  • Inspiring mug
  • Funny book
  • Essential oil
  • Journal
  • (In our case, a new pen)
  • Stuffed animal (I know!)
  • Headphones
  • Chocolate
  • Tea
  • Coloring book
  • Something personal



Self Discovery activities

Dear Fellow Journalers,

Someone once said “it’s not enough to talk the talk, you have to walk the walk”. In other words, if you are really serious about discovering who you are then you have to put on your discovery hat and go for it!

One of the ways to enhance your growth is  to write in a  journal. But you are already doing that! Another way is to write a Personal Manifesto. Simply put, you describe your core values and beliefs, the specific ideas and priorities that you stand for and how you plan to live your life. This document will help frame your life, point you in the right direction to help you achieve your goals and become more attuned to becoming your real self.

To get started ask yourself questions that require more than “yes or no answers such as what things do I stand for? How do I want to live my life? What type of mentors or friends do I need to help me on this path I have chosen?

Print out your Manifesto and refer to it every day.







Books and your life

Dear Fellow Journalers,

Does what you read “for pleasure” tell you something about your personality? Oscar Wilde once wrote “It is what you read when you don’t have to that determines who you will be when you can’t help it”. In essence, I think, we seek specific reading content that reflects our identities and views. There was a study that examined the connection between personality and people’s favorite books. It was based on the Big 5 Personality Traits:

Openess (those people who are creative, imaginative, curious and adventurous) Those people tended to read books that stimulated their intelligence and mostly read non-fiction, art books and some classics.

Conscientiousness (those people who were thoughtful, organized, goal-orientated) Those people tended to read religious, and  books in their career field.

 Extroverts (those people who were sociable, expressive, talkative, outgoing.) Those people read books about relationships, memories and autobiographies.

Agreeableness ( those people who were kind, trusting, cooperative)  Agreeable people read mostly books about relationships, faith-based and family drama.

Neuroticism (Neurotic people tended to have mood swings, lots of anxiety issues and are stressed a lot of the time. These people read to escape their lives so sci-fi books are high on their agenda.

In my view our tastes in books change over time like our lives. When I was young I loved to read adventure stories. As a teenager,  I read all the Nancy Drew books and of course, “The Little House” books. I was introduced to “Black Beauty by my Grandmother and so began my “love affair with horses and western. I admit freely that I liked most of “the required reading”books of high school and college (“Rebecca” and Tale of Two Cities” to name a couple).

If you take a look at The Good Reads column on the right side of my posts you will see a partial lit of what I m currently reading.

What does your bookcase say about you?



Self Discovery Prompts

Dear Fellow Journalers,

There’s a line from one of my favorite stories that goes like this:

“Be gentle with his feelings”

Sometimes, in the throes of grief, despair, anger, loneliness we attack ourselves and others. A journal of self discovery can help us sort through the many layers of one’s life and create a safe place to vent. By being gentle with ourselves we can become a better person.

Some prompts for self-love are:

  • What good habit do you want to begin this month?
  • What do you  need to start saying “yes” to?
  • What do you need to forgive yourself for?
  • What is your biggest struggle of loving yourself? And finally,
  • Find a verse, poem or quote that inspires you in your current situation and write it down. Repeat it every day this month.


Reflections of myself

Dear Fellow Journalers,

Do you remember the soundtrack from the movie “The Thomas Crown Affair”? The title is, appropriately enough, “The Windmills of your mind.” The last rather lengthy line is as follows:

“Like a circle in a spiral

Like a wheel within a wheel

Never ending or beginning

On a ever- spinning reel

As the images unwind

Like the circles that you find

In the windmills of your mind.”

Back in 1950 two men Joseph Luft and Harrington Ingham invented the Johari Window as a model for mapping personality awareness. The idea was to take a fixed list of positive adjectives describing oneself and put them in a grid. To get started the person would make copies of the grid and then pick 5 or 6 of the adjectives that they thought best described themselves. They would then send their friends and co-workers the same list and ask them to describe him. In a similar way, a negative grid of adjectives could be drawn and the whole window of oneself  would be revealed.

Much later in the 1990’s, I was working in corporate America and the idea of this interactive personality “quiz” was presented in a workshop. Back then it wasn’t in the form of a grid but a circle much like the one below:

We were each given a piece of white paper with two circles drawn on it. The outer ring was for co-workers and the inner ring was for us. Our instructions were to make copies o the circle and give them to friends and co-workers and in private fill in the open circle with our strengths and traits. After about a week we were to collect the circles and we would be revealed. Of course, the exercise was voluntary and confidential and most of us agreed that it was certainly eye-opening!

Some of the comments I received then we’re thoughtful, leader, cheerful, reliable, dedicated, well-organized. I wonder what people would write now?



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