Stuff

08 Jul 2015 Comments Off

Dear Fellow Journalers,

This is a classic G post. Enjoy!

~Sallie

I don’t know about you, but I have too much stuff. You know, that stuff that just appears and accumulates in one’s life. And I guarantee you that stuff is a prolific breeder. Wherever you have stuff, more stuff will mysteriously and magically appear. Stuff hates to be alone.

No one is exactly sure what causes stuff to be. In my case, one cause is that I’ll be in a store somewhere, see something, and say Hey that’s cool. I can use that. Then, I’ll find that item, two years later, still in its original packaging, has become stuff.

The best that can happen is that when you’re going through stuff, you come across something that you have an immediate need / use for. You put the item into service right then and there. It stops being stuff at this point.

The worst that can happen is you come across stuff and ask yourself What the hell did I buy that for?! Then you must dispose of it or retain it as stuff. If you retain, that’s when the phenom known as stuff begins. And remember, stuff breeds stuff.

I recently spent an afternoon going through stuff. That’s when I discovered the absolute worst thing that can happen. Intending to rid myself of a bunch of stuff, I fell victim to one of stuffs best allies But I may have a use for this SOMEDAY!. Working closely together, stuff may have us conspire to take over all the space in your life. If you’re not careful, you’ll wake up one day and say Where did all this stuff come from?!

Stuff also can cast a magic spell. This spell has us saying, I’ve got to clean this stuff up SOMEDAY! Well friends, I’ve checked several calendars, and there’s no day of the week named SOMEDAY.

You know something else? If you don’t clean up your stuff, when you die, other people will come in and clean it up. Know what they’ll say? Look at all this shit stuff (insert your name) had? Why did they save this stuff?

OK gang, time to clean up your stuff. BE RUTHLESS! Don’t fall prey to the traps I’ve outlined. Get rid of a lot of stuff. Especially those wayward parts for a coffee maker you had ten years ago.

P.S. If when you’re cleaning out your stuff, you find some real good stuff, and you can’t bear to throw it out, send it over to my house! I’ve cleaned out so much that my stuff is getting lonely and needs more stuff to keep it company! Besides, and you know this is true, your stuff will accumulate more stuff again anyway!